1. currently, they have the 2 most slowest central defenders in the league. carragher, though spiritful at times, tend to be slower against nimble attackers and cannot pass the ball properly to save his skin. he tends to hoof the ball into the air all the time and creates little movement for his central midfielders to operate. hypia, meanwhile, is just freaking old and creaking. he can’t win headers anymore, which is to his trait his only decent contribution. he’d lost that however.
2. having a right footed fullback playing leftback is never, ever, a good policy to begin with. arbeloa can play, but is limited because he will cut in to pass the ball whenever he moves forward. this, completely destroys any attacking forays down the left. never ever before a team has won with that kind of player playing as left back. case in point? winterburn, irwin, cole and now evra have been instrumental in protecting the left slot as well as contribution to attack up front.
3. even though they are flourished with central midfielders, benitez cannot make his mind who is his best 2 central pairing. again, all teams who had won the premiership had the intelligence of their best pairings in central midfield to develop understanding and partnership. just look back into the past to see viera and petit, keane and scholes and most recently lampar(d) and makalele.
4. again, no decent left wingers. currently only benayoun make a decent choice for the role of left wing, but as expected he rarely starts a game. bummer.
5. the team depends too much on gerard making him too big of an ego for the team. this is not good as whenever gerard does not play well, others follow suit. he seems to have lost his tenacity and drive and is too one dimensional depending only his hard shots to save his play. either he picks himself up and motivate his team mates or else is better off somewhere else. case in point? look at the teams who shipped out their true marquee players and how the team responded after their departure (henry, keane, cantona). it seems a whole lot of pressure has been lifted from the rest of the team.
6. reina needs to change his jersey number. just a hunch.
7. rafa not chewing more gum and wearing his ugly collection of ties. and please, shave off that goatee.
8. carlsberg is the sponsor. it’s a curse i tell you.
9. voronin needs to cut his ponytail. babel is better at right wing. crouch needs to do his robot dance as a crowd pleaser. and sissoko to don a beard ala osama. riise has the worse haircut, ever. and somebody, anybody please give credit to steve finnan as he is by far the best player (besides torres) at the moment.
10. alex ferguson is still alive.