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Shut out, pimpled and angry. I quietly tied all my guts into knots. Gave up on trying to make them, I figured it’d take them too long to look up and besides…

It was undeniably clear to me i don’t know why when every other part of life seemed locked behind shutters I knew what worthless dregs we’ve always been. Lucked out and found my favorite records, lying in wait at the birmingham mall. The songs that i heard, the occasional book were the only fun i ever took. And i got on with making myself. the trick is just making yourself. But when they’re parking their cars on your chest, you’ve still got a view of the summer sky. To make it hurt twice when your restless body. Caves to its whims and suddenly struggles to take flight…

Three thousand miles north east, I left all my friends at the morning bus stop shaking their heads. “what kind of life you dream of? you’re allergic to love.” Yes i know but i must say in my own defense. It’s been undeniably dear to me, i don’t know why. When every other part of life seemed locked behind shutters. I knew the worthless dregs we are, The selfless, loving saints we are, The melting, sliding dice we’ve always been.

know your onion

Gold teeth and a curse for this town were all in my mouth. Only, i don’t know how they got out, dear. Turn me back into the pet that i was when we met.
I was happier then with no mind-set.

And if you’d ‘a took to me like a gull takes to the wind. Well, i’d ‘a jumped from my tree and i’d a danced like the king of the eyesores And the rest of our lives would ‘a fared well.

New slang when you notice the stripes, the dirt in your fries. Hope it’s right when you die, old and bony. Dawn breaks like a bull through the hall, never should have called but my head’s to the wall and i’m lonely.

And if you’d ‘a took to me like a gull takes to the wind. Well, i’d ‘a jumped from my tree and i’d a danced like the king of the eyesores And the rest of our lives would ‘a fared well.

God speed all the bakers at dawn may they all cut their thumbs, and bleed into their buns ’till they melt away. I’m looking in on the good life i might be doomed never to find. Without a trust or flaming fields am i too dumb to refine? And if you’d ‘a took to me like well i’d a danced like the queen of the eyesores and the rest of our lives would ‘a fared well.

new slang

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something bothers me.

if ah seng lee says that singaporeans have to move on and stop debating about the casino issues – because prolonging this topic can only cause unhealthy repurcussions – why don’t him and his posse keep a blind eye when articles about their methods of ruling are being published and not start defamotary threats and court proceedings?

isn’t it like living in a house ruled by a chauvinistic father who rules by his rules but boasts to his friends and everyone else that he gives sovereign independence to his children?

i say ‘double standards’ is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay of an understatement.

i hope i don’t get arrested but who am i to say? i’m just krafty.

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i like sean penn. he gives this brooding persona onscreen, engaging his audience to pay attention to him. he can’t give a damn how people look at him or how he looks. he looks horrible, with tousled hair and face with creaky lines and eyes that bags. (sounds like me.) he can’t give a damn about authority and whatnots, as long as his ass is not on the line, or any whereabouts.

i went to catch the interpreter. i couldn’t see a more obvious indication what the movie centralizes on. an interpreter, duh. the plot was a bit mismatched. interpreter overheard something, reported it, agent got suspicious, worked on the case, had feelings for his subject, suspect got caught. how straightforward is that? the plot didn’t interest me, actually. everything seems a bit vague and there were little twists to make a big impact on event proceedings.

i did like the acting by both main characters however. both exuded hurt and despair and trying their best to overcome their emotions. at best, they were trying to erase the ghosts of their past by dealing with the present which unintentionally brought them together. sean penn looks dumbfounded with little lines, but that’s him at best. he looks intense. nicole kidman looks serene and bright, but purposely or not she keeps hiding a lot of material for the viewer to identify.

she rides a cute scooter though.

and i wonder what is the possibility of an agent involved with a high-risk ‘espionage’, who just lost his wife only 2 weeks back, can develop a deep feeling for a mysterious woman – a very hot chick who spoke with a foreign accent – whom he didn’t know what her intention was. aaahhh, the benefits of working at the united nations. now, that’s a satisfying job i tell you.

you are in new york. both of you are single. and smart. and say witty lines but kids, bear in mind, you are not on the set of when harry met sally.

i see better hair with a green bottle.

i amik off hari nih, but you nak break up ngan i?

next stop – the assassination of richard nixon.

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hi my name is sarip.

for all i can remember, i’ve never introduced myself well enough.

i say, let’s do it then.

i’m 27. still living off my parents though they are not working anymore and loves to eat slobbishly off the computer table and leaving food stains on the tabletop as well as the keyboard which makes my friend adam the ant and willy the cocky very happy. i work in a school for the dyslexics and i’m very suspicious that i’m one too.
you see, i can’t socialise very well and i tend to lose memory very fast and my table, room, floor, wardrobe is highly disorganised and to a certain fact that
is one of the classic traits of the dyslexic. i did try to negotiate a deal with my collegues to test me for free but they thought i was being funny. everyday i slogged myself to work riding the train and boarding the bus and the whole journey is occupied wiping sweat off my face, body and every other unmentionable body parts.
i feel trapped in the trains but buses give me pleasure because i can lay this head of mine against the glass panels and it allows me to feel the vibration of the vehicle. until now, im still trying to figure out my purpose at work. each day i’ll try to make up new stories and senarios to make myself useful and needed. however the rest of the time i will be stealing cookies from the pantry, collecting sugar satchets and make patterns based on my working table. sometimes i like to draw happy faces on sheets of paper while looking out of the window where once a collegue of mine shrieked at an eagle that flew across our building. though i am not sure if that’s true because you see i cant see very well. most of the times, i just walk through the motion at work and eventually try to reflect to myself what have i done for the day with the feeling of unimaginable guilt inverted commas. i am afraid of crowds actually and people eventually. i’m still covering myself in a cocoon to avoid a lot of my disabilities to the outside world, as if there isn’t that little to see. i’m highly insecure and dissing people is just a way for me to communicate my unattractiveness to the community. i like music and movies too. i like obscure bands with vague music whom people find a tad difficult to understand eventually and i can’t sleep without turning the music on. some acts that i can remember now which i like are the shins, iron and wine, bob dylan, neil young, john denver, beck, broken social scene and these just happens to be playing on my player. i wish i can act, direct and play. i love to see good films and i love to reflect the motives of certain films. when i was growing up i love to watch gomer pyle and i used to rush home from school just to manage myself to be in front of the telly. sbc5 used to telecast classic 50s and 60s sub-american family tv shows. it was nice. i like to read articles about politics, history and religion. i figured all 3 are co-related and influenced by my uncle i like to read books on the comparison of religions though i’m not a pious person myself. my parents are two loving people though we often shriek, taunt and yell at each other when the mood sets in. i can be highly impatient and demands results to be seen for no reason why. i have an enemy on clothings. most clothes doesn’t seem to fit and match me and most of the time i’ll look like a slob from a rundown shacktown. i can’t manage my hair and i gave up twiddling with it.

but there will be hope…

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yo, im the new one.

i’m german and we’re gonna win the world cup next year.

first priority on the list – we’re gonna fucked up every england penalty shot. i still remember 1966, so now it’s time for me to seek vengence.

bless you 3 lions though. *ah choo*

next rule, take these away from the shelves.

especially to the person who looks like that figurine. what the fuck had happened to him? her? no, him. no, her. no….

and aspiring future card dealers in singapore, please don’t deal with these, yah?

+++

i think i’ll just showcase the emo emo blog lah.

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as expected, bloggers everywhere will put in their 2 cents worth on the casino topic. wah liau, how i want to stand out now? lemme see, let’s try something radical in trying to be “uniquely poseurish”.

i read with interest (again) the main drive for the gahmen to pursue this is because they want more money. money speaks, money rules, money everything. u do good u do bad, they don’t care. as long u give them money many many they will be happy. so in light with the FTA agreement they sign last year with chile right, i say why not they start to deal in the drugs industry too? now u have straight route to latin america, sure can deal easy easy one right? i tell u ah drugs industry give 60% GDP to latin america ho sey liau. u look ah at the movies, all those latino drug cartels all super rich rich can even buy small country. got private army sumore. best thing u don’t have to invite tourist to come here. u just package the stuff, export it out then proudly stamp “made in singapore product” with ISO 9001 approval somemore. mat drug happy, high class drug takers happy, dealers happy, all happy. i tell u, if this one go ahead u dont have to wait till 2009 to see the results. next week already you can see one, don’t have to wait long long.

*i am soooooo suuuued.*

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if i ever had a kid, these are the few things that i want to instill in him/her for his upbringing.

1. i will buy the child clothes with cards designs on it so he can identify the different types of concept of card characters. start them young.

2. dice and roulettes will be used as cuttleries in order for the child to familiarise with the disposition and technique of the game.

3. instill robert de nero as the child’s favourite actor. or maybe chow yun fatt. for b-list actors, mebbe we can show james caan on tv. but please not li nanxing.

4. for child development intelligence i will proceed with the child the art of bluffing. tell lies, look cool under pressure and know (the most important) how to cheat well.

hopefully the goverment will start a scholarship plan for talented child gamblers in order to attract the public’s and international’s attention. we have to be the best in everything right, so i would like to suggest the gahmen to start a new gambling school. if we can set up stalls, we have to educate them too, in order to pursue our land’s ambition to be an educational hub.

dear gahmen, why set up 2 sites when you can go for a royal flush by setting up 3 as well?