Shut out, pimpled and angry. I quietly tied all my guts into knots. Gave up on trying to make them, I figured it’d take them too long to look up and besides…

It was undeniably clear to me i don’t know why when every other part of life seemed locked behind shutters I knew what worthless dregs we’ve always been. Lucked out and found my favorite records, lying in wait at the birmingham mall. The songs that i heard, the occasional book were the only fun i ever took. And i got on with making myself. the trick is just making yourself. But when they’re parking their cars on your chest, you’ve still got a view of the summer sky. To make it hurt twice when your restless body. Caves to its whims and suddenly struggles to take flight…

Three thousand miles north east, I left all my friends at the morning bus stop shaking their heads. “what kind of life you dream of? you’re allergic to love.” Yes i know but i must say in my own defense. It’s been undeniably dear to me, i don’t know why. When every other part of life seemed locked behind shutters. I knew the worthless dregs we are, The selfless, loving saints we are, The melting, sliding dice we’ve always been.

know your onion

Gold teeth and a curse for this town were all in my mouth. Only, i don’t know how they got out, dear. Turn me back into the pet that i was when we met.
I was happier then with no mind-set.

And if you’d ‘a took to me like a gull takes to the wind. Well, i’d ‘a jumped from my tree and i’d a danced like the king of the eyesores And the rest of our lives would ‘a fared well.

New slang when you notice the stripes, the dirt in your fries. Hope it’s right when you die, old and bony. Dawn breaks like a bull through the hall, never should have called but my head’s to the wall and i’m lonely.

And if you’d ‘a took to me like a gull takes to the wind. Well, i’d ‘a jumped from my tree and i’d a danced like the king of the eyesores And the rest of our lives would ‘a fared well.

God speed all the bakers at dawn may they all cut their thumbs, and bleed into their buns ’till they melt away. I’m looking in on the good life i might be doomed never to find. Without a trust or flaming fields am i too dumb to refine? And if you’d ‘a took to me like well i’d a danced like the queen of the eyesores and the rest of our lives would ‘a fared well.

new slang


something bothers me.

if ah seng lee says that singaporeans have to move on and stop debating about the casino issues – because prolonging this topic can only cause unhealthy repurcussions – why don’t him and his posse keep a blind eye when articles about their methods of ruling are being published and not start defamotary threats and court proceedings?

isn’t it like living in a house ruled by a chauvinistic father who rules by his rules but boasts to his friends and everyone else that he gives sovereign independence to his children?

i say ‘double standards’ is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay of an understatement.

i hope i don’t get arrested but who am i to say? i’m just krafty.


i like sean penn. he gives this brooding persona onscreen, engaging his audience to pay attention to him. he can’t give a damn how people look at him or how he looks. he looks horrible, with tousled hair and face with creaky lines and eyes that bags. (sounds like me.) he can’t give a damn about authority and whatnots, as long as his ass is not on the line, or any whereabouts.

i went to catch the interpreter. i couldn’t see a more obvious indication what the movie centralizes on. an interpreter, duh. the plot was a bit mismatched. interpreter overheard something, reported it, agent got suspicious, worked on the case, had feelings for his subject, suspect got caught. how straightforward is that? the plot didn’t interest me, actually. everything seems a bit vague and there were little twists to make a big impact on event proceedings.

i did like the acting by both main characters however. both exuded hurt and despair and trying their best to overcome their emotions. at best, they were trying to erase the ghosts of their past by dealing with the present which unintentionally brought them together. sean penn looks dumbfounded with little lines, but that’s him at best. he looks intense. nicole kidman looks serene and bright, but purposely or not she keeps hiding a lot of material for the viewer to identify.

she rides a cute scooter though.

and i wonder what is the possibility of an agent involved with a high-risk ‘espionage’, who just lost his wife only 2 weeks back, can develop a deep feeling for a mysterious woman – a very hot chick who spoke with a foreign accent – whom he didn’t know what her intention was. aaahhh, the benefits of working at the united nations. now, that’s a satisfying job i tell you.

you are in new york. both of you are single. and smart. and say witty lines but kids, bear in mind, you are not on the set of when harry met sally.

i see better hair with a green bottle.

i amik off hari nih, but you nak break up ngan i?

next stop – the assassination of richard nixon.


hi my name is sarip.

for all i can remember, i’ve never introduced myself well enough.

i say, let’s do it then.

i’m 27. still living off my parents though they are not working anymore and loves to eat slobbishly off the computer table and leaving food stains on the tabletop as well as the keyboard which makes my friend adam the ant and willy the cocky very happy. i work in a school for the dyslexics and i’m very suspicious that i’m one too.
you see, i can’t socialise very well and i tend to lose memory very fast and my table, room, floor, wardrobe is highly disorganised and to a certain fact that
is one of the classic traits of the dyslexic. i did try to negotiate a deal with my collegues to test me for free but they thought i was being funny. everyday i slogged myself to work riding the train and boarding the bus and the whole journey is occupied wiping sweat off my face, body and every other unmentionable body parts.
i feel trapped in the trains but buses give me pleasure because i can lay this head of mine against the glass panels and it allows me to feel the vibration of the vehicle. until now, im still trying to figure out my purpose at work. each day i’ll try to make up new stories and senarios to make myself useful and needed. however the rest of the time i will be stealing cookies from the pantry, collecting sugar satchets and make patterns based on my working table. sometimes i like to draw happy faces on sheets of paper while looking out of the window where once a collegue of mine shrieked at an eagle that flew across our building. though i am not sure if that’s true because you see i cant see very well. most of the times, i just walk through the motion at work and eventually try to reflect to myself what have i done for the day with the feeling of unimaginable guilt inverted commas. i am afraid of crowds actually and people eventually. i’m still covering myself in a cocoon to avoid a lot of my disabilities to the outside world, as if there isn’t that little to see. i’m highly insecure and dissing people is just a way for me to communicate my unattractiveness to the community. i like music and movies too. i like obscure bands with vague music whom people find a tad difficult to understand eventually and i can’t sleep without turning the music on. some acts that i can remember now which i like are the shins, iron and wine, bob dylan, neil young, john denver, beck, broken social scene and these just happens to be playing on my player. i wish i can act, direct and play. i love to see good films and i love to reflect the motives of certain films. when i was growing up i love to watch gomer pyle and i used to rush home from school just to manage myself to be in front of the telly. sbc5 used to telecast classic 50s and 60s sub-american family tv shows. it was nice. i like to read articles about politics, history and religion. i figured all 3 are co-related and influenced by my uncle i like to read books on the comparison of religions though i’m not a pious person myself. my parents are two loving people though we often shriek, taunt and yell at each other when the mood sets in. i can be highly impatient and demands results to be seen for no reason why. i have an enemy on clothings. most clothes doesn’t seem to fit and match me and most of the time i’ll look like a slob from a rundown shacktown. i can’t manage my hair and i gave up twiddling with it.

but there will be hope…


yo, im the new one.

i’m german and we’re gonna win the world cup next year.

first priority on the list – we’re gonna fucked up every england penalty shot. i still remember 1966, so now it’s time for me to seek vengence.

bless you 3 lions though. *ah choo*

next rule, take these away from the shelves.

especially to the person who looks like that figurine. what the fuck had happened to him? her? no, him. no, her. no….

and aspiring future card dealers in singapore, please don’t deal with these, yah?


i think i’ll just showcase the emo emo blog lah.


as expected, bloggers everywhere will put in their 2 cents worth on the casino topic. wah liau, how i want to stand out now? lemme see, let’s try something radical in trying to be “uniquely poseurish”.

i read with interest (again) the main drive for the gahmen to pursue this is because they want more money. money speaks, money rules, money everything. u do good u do bad, they don’t care. as long u give them money many many they will be happy. so in light with the FTA agreement they sign last year with chile right, i say why not they start to deal in the drugs industry too? now u have straight route to latin america, sure can deal easy easy one right? i tell u ah drugs industry give 60% GDP to latin america ho sey liau. u look ah at the movies, all those latino drug cartels all super rich rich can even buy small country. got private army sumore. best thing u don’t have to invite tourist to come here. u just package the stuff, export it out then proudly stamp “made in singapore product” with ISO 9001 approval somemore. mat drug happy, high class drug takers happy, dealers happy, all happy. i tell u, if this one go ahead u dont have to wait till 2009 to see the results. next week already you can see one, don’t have to wait long long.

*i am soooooo suuuued.*


if i ever had a kid, these are the few things that i want to instill in him/her for his upbringing.

1. i will buy the child clothes with cards designs on it so he can identify the different types of concept of card characters. start them young.

2. dice and roulettes will be used as cuttleries in order for the child to familiarise with the disposition and technique of the game.

3. instill robert de nero as the child’s favourite actor. or maybe chow yun fatt. for b-list actors, mebbe we can show james caan on tv. but please not li nanxing.

4. for child development intelligence i will proceed with the child the art of bluffing. tell lies, look cool under pressure and know (the most important) how to cheat well.

hopefully the goverment will start a scholarship plan for talented child gamblers in order to attract the public’s and international’s attention. we have to be the best in everything right, so i would like to suggest the gahmen to start a new gambling school. if we can set up stalls, we have to educate them too, in order to pursue our land’s ambition to be an educational hub.

dear gahmen, why set up 2 sites when you can go for a royal flush by setting up 3 as well?


the company for last friday night was great. and after a long while, i finally managed to bump into didi. as usual it’s same ‘ol, same ‘ol. there is one thing, however, that seems to disturb me though. for the night itself, i just could not get any groove to soak in the atmosphere. i am old, i remind myself. and these places seems to sprout the quirkiest kind of characters. there was this midget and his posse and as expected the syiok sendiri tension will arise. sometimes, i wonder what were on their minds as they flung their arms and make those 2 steps dances. attention yes, appreciation no.

i , too, was hit by the syiok sendiri syndrome, which happens often anyway. maybe i need more than 2 the next time, yes?

moving on, the handphone has been misplaced. again. hopefully, someone will invent a handcuff for handphones for people like me.

i love those cows that’s been placed on grass patches. they’re cute, adorable and so nice. each day as i pass patterson road to work, i’ll notice them grazing along. is it a crime to take one of those home? i would love to display it on my ceiling.

mooing along, i love the music of low. very soft, melodic and inspiring. i like it, you should too.


i was watching the news today and the main issue reported was the disintergrating relationship between japan + china / japan + korea / japan + hidetoshi nakata being a primadona he is.

seems like them making lots of tension moments don’t they, for a country that vehemently practices the art of zen.

come to the main point, don’t people realise what politicians do anyway? it seems any grudges they make or says out can create major, major repurcussions. either these politicians are made to be uber sensitive people or those who forgets the meaning of leading a country.

i say, you are not happy with that politician from that country, why don’t just book a flight, meet him and settle it amongst themselves there and then and not drag the whole nation into it. what about nationalistic values you say? say what…?? if you want to be nationalistic, how about this – go and set up your own country. now that can be a new idea for a reality show, ain’t it so?

and it comes to my surprise how is it suddenly the president is in malaysia all of the sudden. not that i was aware of, but normally if there was a state visit by an official to another country, they’ll announce who will be the person who’ll take over momentarily. either i was ignorant about that announcement or something fishy has been going on to pursuade the nathan to go up there. thousand apologies to identify you as “the”.

and gettis, they’re still showcasing the subjectivity of casinos. a special programme was telecast to demonstrate the good and mostly bad “things” that’s been currently made home in macau. for the love of god, i’ll say e n u f f of identifying this subject. just build it and move along cos everyone knows its going to be built. we are just waiting how the fireworks will be showcased on “the grand opening” of it already.

the morning express gave a pointer on regards why people are so obsessed with the idea of morality in building a casino when no one raises an eye over the issue of the geylang prostitutions. dear, dear djs, lemme give a reply. it all relates to the idea of money that has given this morality check. how much profit does a casino generate for THEM in comparison to those russian girls at lor 14 (i think). let’s look in this direction – it’s not about how bad the influences will generate from the establishment of these “institutions”, it’s more about how the power’s to be will be / are using their power to motivate the minor classes in order to benefit themselves. the rich wants to get richer and they’ll suck out every hook and penny they could gather from the people. i think that’s a higher morality issue to see rather than some vice, no doubt how bad it is.

god knows where will the money go to once the profits come ringing in. and as far as i knew there was never a debate in parliament on the effects of the prostitution ring or the plight of them plying the trade.

to be blunt, of these 2 which one would u rather get screwed?

i’m done.


whenever im walking and somebody will walk across me, i tend to sidestep and cut across their path. the person will step to his left, and i’ll correspond. to the right and somehow this body will react the same. most embarassingly, there are incidents wer both me and the other person will sidestep a few times as if we are coordinating a dance move.

what dar dei!? everywer go oways must cut across people path’s one!


well as expected, they lost. pity really cos i like their appearence on the telly with those funny quotes and antics. right on!

well at least we all knew who won it anyway.

moving on, i’ve this fetish for THAT singtel ad. godamn, that chick that one who dancing dancing in that lift makes me wish to be trapped in there. for hours. each time that ad appears, mr dol here will flutter flutter aksyen aksyen dancing dancing together together.

and so, with nothing to do at work today i went investigating – to find out who the heck this lady was. and the search ended when accidentally bumped into this.

not bad, not bad.


“It’s time to prove to your friends that you’re worth a damn. Sometimes that means dying, sometimes it means killing a whole lot of people.”

how could you not love a movie with lines like that? that’s marv by the way, my current affaciando.

sometimes, while listening to the morning express, it wonders me what goes on to the deejays’ mind. we have one who laughs as if he’s supposed to laugh for the sake of laughing, while the other tends to shake up subjects for the sake of bringing it up. there are some funny bits, but the rest? for example, what’s up with the top 10 lists? that is so passe man. and for goodness sake, minimise the volume of that laughter. i don’t want to wake up early in the morning to hear someone’s excruciating laugh for no certain reason whatsoever. what will be next on the agenda once they realised there is nothing left to shake the bird’s nest? how to sharpen pencils correctly?

of course i’m bitter. they get loads more money doing things i’ve ever dream off.

ive had this weak sensation listening to those heart strings songs. ya know, the one with very soft guitar sounds, or tender ivories meloding in the background, with vocals which came and went at a single breath and then suddenly solemnly fades into silence.

i love `em. every verse creates a melodic heartwarming drumbeat to the heart. seems these songs can be saviours after all.

recapping on events happened the previous week. i’m baffled with the fascination of chalet birthdays. i’m not against it, but 9 out of 10 times these events churns out the same scenarios.

a) people will just eat and wait for the food to be ready to be eaten.
b) after they ate, everyone will move into their own niches.
c) when they’re in their own niches, they tend to stare into the open sky, or if they’re bored will look religiously into their handphones.
d) ghost stories are a must, no matter how ‘world’ they can be.
e) worse of all, get drunk. i dun get that.

that’s about it, i think. i’m not sure about any shennigans happening around whilst there, but nuthing much develops anyway. so come to the point of question – what is it with chalets? food? drinks? yabadabadoo? tell me please cos i’m always at lost while im at one.

bucker up.


rancangan melayu macam ada nih tradisi tau bikin rancangan khas untuk tonjolkan hal ehwal semasa rakyat muda mereka.

apa yang aku membebel? ah ni pasal itu rancangan terbitan soojeemee hanyut yang baru habis tuh.

apa pulak komplen aku nih skarang pulak?

begini, ternyata ni aku dah fedup pasal ni rancangan sumer. lebih tepat – cukuplah nih shock factor ni sumer. orang dah tau ni benda sumer, apa lagi nak tonjolkan? nak dramatik lagi? apa kata lain kali tunjukkan episod bekas anak remaja yang dulu samseng geng suka bantai orang lepas tuh curi anak orang lepas tuh masuk dalam kem budak2 nakal lepas tuh insaf dan skarang boleh buat 100 pushups sambil tiup seruling dalam satu minit?

bagus tuh kan. very dramatik sama apa tuh..boleh meneka dengan tepat akan diaorang nye kandungan dalam 5 minit pertama rancangan.

lepas tuh panggil wakil wakil sosial yang abang abang ni sumer yang cakap tak berhenti henti macam nak buat pilihanraya undi puncak umum tapi berbual tak nak tengok kamera lepas tuh side shot si pengacara rancangan yang angguk angguk lepas tuh tanya soalan yang paling kahpluak skali di dunia, “apakah pandangan saudara akan isu ini?”

apa kata lain kali kalau nak bawak ahli panel ke rakaman bawak dua orang yang tak happy, lepas tuh time diaorang bikin rakaman satu member dari kumpulan yang lain cuba tunjuk skilling kat sidini nye pompuan lepas tuh member tak happy lepas tuh gaduh lepas tuh set semua hancur. baru drama habis.

(eh tak boleh pasal dah macam jerry springer. intellectual property rights yew noe.)

cukup! cukup ni rancangan sumua! cukup bawak kisah masalah2 sosial ke tv pasal nampak sah semua dah tak ada idea lain nak terbit.

dan apasal eh saluran tv3 banyak sangat abertise iklan jual jual CD “KOMPILASI TERBAIK!” selang tiap2 2 minit? i tell u tv3, i dah naik bingit asik tengok u all promote macam macam album yang keluar di pasaran ok. ni TV, bukan RADIO.

dah tu ajer. slamat hari jadi ke saya.